Hey guys it’s Oba, I’ll love to briefly speak to you about friendship.
This write up is fully inspired by the New Year 2018. I hope as you read you’ll enjoy and learn from my thoughts and experiences.
As the year 2017 was coming to an end, there were a number of posts on social media where people stated how they’ll be cutting a few people out of their lives and affairs. There were also those who came out to thank and appreciate people whom they felt made the year a memorable one; I can tell you this act must have caused some rift between friends because I was a victim. I posted pictures of a few friends with captions on my whatsapp status and my phone nearly went into flames with messages from contacts whose pictures failed to show up on my whatsapp status.
This was a big mistake; I had to begin an apology session. I told them different stories as I tried to fix the damage my actions and inactions had caused. Everyone deserves to be loved and appreciated, you know! The intention behind my action was not to make anyone feel bad nor to make them feel rejected, I was only bored so I decided to disturb my viewers with numerous whatsapp updates but the fun went wrong and I had no choice other than to delete them all at once. I feel it’s all wrong to quantify our value in people’s lives by what we say about them, we should think deeply and look closely at how important people are before saying we’re cutting anyone off. Remember that no one is an island.
Having had that experience I felt a need to speak up on this issue. The fact that you didn’t feature in someone’s hall of fame for a particular year doesn’t mean you haven’t made an impactful in the person’s life that year. The truth is that we cannot be valuable to a person in every way, there are different times when different people will be needed for various things we may not be able to do and at that point other people become helpful. Remember I said no one is an island.
Sometimes it’s not just about what someone can do for you; we also need to start considering what we can do for others. If everyone says because I didn’t show up in Oba’s status on the 31st of December 2017 it means I’m not valuable to him, I’ll lose more than half of the people that meaningfully impact into my life on a daily basis. There are minor things people do that affect you; the fact that you don’t talk to them daily doesn’t mean they are not valuable to you. The world we live in currently encourages ‘connections’ and anyone you decide to dump today may be the person you need tomorrow. Remember I said no one is an island.
It is high time we opened our eyes and look well; everyone you meet has a role to play in your life no matter how little that role might be; not everyone is replaceable. Taking a critical look at my personal life as a photographer, I don’t have a crew for my job yet all through 2017 I never lacked assistance. Whether they were paid or not, I had willing minds and hands. Although at the end of the year not every one of these people got a special appreciation from me, they unarguably aided my success all through the year. Hence, there’s no such thing as little in friendship because every little thing counts.
Now I’ll summarize this by saying you must have an inner circle of friends that have similar visions and goals as you do. These people would be there to advice you when the need arises; you need them to call you back when you are straying off the track. You are allowed to have friends several friends but your inner circle must be intact; it doesn’t have to be a crowd, just a few like minds with goals they are willing to achieve.
In conclusion, do not disregard the little things that matter and do not cut people off because they do not show us the gratitude we believe we deserve, but try to reason with everything that goes on around you. The people you think have done nothing for you sometimes turn out to be the only ones who have done something for you. Remember I said no one is an island.
Written by: Obaloluwa (2018) @obas_imagery.
Photo source: Google Chrome.